Janet Eileen Shestakov

Janet Shestakov, nee Rossman, was born in Philadelphia PA; the second of three daughters of Leon and Mollie Rossman, all also born in Philadelphia.  She had a happy early childhood, happy that is, until the youngest girl, Donna, came around.  After that, elder sister Karen kept her first child status and now with Donna, Janet had to yield baby-of-family privileges.  Perhaps, this inequity made Janet what she became, a fighter.  Nevertheless, her childhood was still joyful.  She was extremely fond of her grandfather who kept little Janet under his wing and did not let first-child or baby-sister titles get in the way of his affection.  Even late in life, Janet fondly remembered the hand-in-hand strolls she used to take with "Grumpy."

Janet developed a close friendship with her sisters, particularly with Donna, since the two shared a bedroom until Karen went off to college.  Unfortunately, Donna is unwilling to share the dirt she has on her sister.

After Penn, Janet returned to Minnesota, worked in office jobs, met and married a handsome young man expecting to settle into the life of a businessman's housewife.  Ricky's job took them to Colorado.  The clean mountain air had a refreshing, liberating effect on Janet.  Marriage, at least not that one, was not for her; she divorced and enrolled at the Univ. of Colorado where she earned a Masters in Public Administration while at the same time, working at Denver's National Jewish Hospital.

In Boulder, she met a brilliant laser physicist grad student.  After Bruce finished his thesis, they moved to California where Janet found employment at the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory.  The lab's unique mission and culture does not have universal appeal.  Someone with "only'' a Masters in Public Administration and hospital work experience may not fit in easily.  Nevertheless, because of Janet's gregarious personality she found a few close friends with whom she never lost touch.  Her beauty and poise naturally attracted attention; she met well-connected prospects.  However, in 1981, while visiting the lab's swimming pool, Janet met a weirdo who inexplicably appealed to her. In the tumultuous year 1983, they married, bought a new car and a house in the Oakland hills.  The house and car purchase  led to the marriage, not vice-versa.  Only after wondering how to take title did Alek propose with, "Listen, if we're going to buy a house and live in it, maybe we should get married?"  Alek had a unique sense of romance.

The informal wedding ceremony was held at the Berkeley Women's Club on September 10, 1983.  The honeymoon consisted of one night in a SF hotel.  In the morning, Alek left to attend a conference in Switzerland.  Janet joined him a week later whereupon they took a three week drive to and throughout Spain, then to Munich, where Alek had finagled a four week visit at the Max Planck Institute, but only for himself.  So Janet went home.  Somehow, the marriage survived.  Janet was very patient.

In ca. 1984, Janet grew restless with the progression of her career.  She quit the lab, tried selling insurance, went back to the lab, and, again on a lark, took the law school qualifying exams.  To the surprise of some, she scored highly and was accepted at both Stanford and Cal's Boalt Hall.  Indeed, after hearing of her success, an acquaintance muttered, "Gee, I didn't know she was that smart.''  No surprise that Legally Blonde was one her favorite movies.

Tough choice then,  Cal or Stanford.  Cheapskate Alek, who bleeds Blue-n-Gold, convinced her to attend Cal.  (One of the few instances when he swayed her opinion.)  Nevertheless, he was always proud of Janet's professional success.  The two were good  partners.  They consulted each other before important decisions.  Janet always asked for his opinion, "Should I stay at this firm or take the new offer?"  After listening to Alek's thoughtful advice, Janet did the opposite.  It proved to be a successful system.  

While Janet was at Boalt, Alek started sailing lessons to wile away hours.  Janet's plan was to again travel to Europe after finishing law school and taking the bar exam.  Alek's plan was to center the three month trip around a three week, bareboat cruise in Greece's Cycladic Islands; just the two of them on a 38' yacht.  How romantic.  Or not.  It was an eventful cruise.  First night out, the transmission linkage broke in the midst of a stern-to docking in tight quarters.  Their yacht sustained enough damage that they replaced it the next day.  Three days later, on the way to Paros island, they spent four days riding out a storm, alone in a god-forsaken tiny bay swinging on an anchor.  At times, the rain came down sideways.  A week later, on a day-long sail to Serifos island, the wind freshened and clocked over to the bow so they had to motor in order to arrive before nightfall.  After a 2-3 hour pounding in rough seas, the motor died.  Bad diesel fouled the injectors.  Up went the sail and they somehow tacked to safety.  They complimented each other well that day.  Janet was too sick to be scared; Alek, too scared to be sick.

To Alek's astonishment, Janet did not file for divorce upon reaching terra firma.  She probably tired of dumping husbands and boyfriends.  In fact, she sailed again with Alek.  Many times.  Besides on SF bay, they bareboated in Washington's San Juan islands, and throughout the eastern Caribbean.  Janet was such a competent and confident sailor that on the last Caribbean trip, she took along their two year old son Adrian and their Danish nanny Diana, who, incidentally, was somewhat uneasy with the concept of small boats on a big ocean. 

Upon returning from the trip to Greece, which included Holland, Germany, and her favorite: Italy, Janet came home to good news.  She passed the bar exam on the first try.  (No surprise.)  Her legal career led to her a law firm, in-house counsel work for Del Monte Corp., and in 1997 to a position as General Counsel of the Brown & Toland Medical Group.  Along the way, she made many, many friends who supported her to her last days, but this gets ahead of her story.

In 1991, Janet endured another bump in the road.  The Oakland  home she loved perished in the hills fire.  She lost everything except her wedding photos and the hand painted dishes she brought back from Deruta, Italy but never used; they were saved for some special occasion.  The tragedy brought the couple closer together and taught them that stuff can be replaced; life and love cannot.  After the fire, Janet did not skip a beat.  She, along with help from her law firm, negotiated with the insurance company and used the proceeds to buy her Lafayette house.  The structure had, in architect parlance, "good bones." Otherwise it needed several organ transplants.  No problem for Janet, over the course of many years, she remodeled  every room and made a lovely home for her family while simultaneously building a successful career. 

Professionally, Janet found her calling at Brown & Toland.  The firm was just getting off the ground and as with all upstarts, there were a few bruises before things took off.  Janet worked for the first CEO, Dr. M. Abel, and from 1999 on, for Superwoman CEO, Gloria Austin.  As General Counsel, Janet performed a delicate balance as advocate for the Board of Directors and the executive team.  Things did not always go swimmingly.  Besides the usual squabbles between boards and executives, there were difficult external issues to contend with.  It was sometimes a damned-if-you-do, damned-if-you-don't situation as B&T became a dominant force in San Francisco.  Too dominant in the eyes of the FTC.  As GC, Janet oversaw the legal team and strategy to keep the firm on the straight and narrow, while maximizing shareholder value.  Janet was a true working Mom.  Per Alek, her priorities were:

(1) Son Adrian, (2) Brown & Toland, (3) Rex, the family dog, (4) Alek.

Although numbers two and three may be misplaced, Alek is sure about one and four.  Nevertheless, the guy got an unbelievable deal.  The lady was beautiful, intelligent, adventurous, athletic, and held a responsible executive position.  Talk about a trophy wife.

Janet's son Adrian, born in 1995, was, is, the center of her life.  At the end of her life, Janet grew very weak.  It was hard to understand her.  Her last words could well have been, "Adrian, did you do your homework?"  She was very proud of him.  She struggled mightily against the disease.  It's hard to imagine a more determined, valiant fight.  Her overwhelming fear and grief were that she would be unable to see Adrian graduate from high school, college, become an adult.  She often said, "If I could just get two or three more years."  

Janet and Alek had a caring, sharing marriage, full of surprises.  One evening, when Adrian was about 6, upon coming home, Alek noticed a strange Audi wagon parked in the driveway.  He paid it no mind thinking it was a visitor of their tenant.  After dinner, Adrian asked, "So, Dad, how do you like your new car?" Alek was understandably shocked.  A long dialogue ensued, "Janet, how could you do this without consulting me?" Etc, etc.  As the conversation became more agitated, Adrian was sent upstairs.  After one of Alek's monologues, Janet, diplomatically suggested, "SHUT THE F*** UP.  IT'S MY MONEY, WE'RE KEEPING THE CAR." Alek always had the last words in such discussions: "Yes, dear."