March 16, 2011
Dear Friends,
And that's my entire salutation.
Although I have relatives in the audience, I am fortunate that I can also call them friends. And friends, as Adrian and I have learned over the past nine months, are what we need most. If wealth can be measured by their number and devotion, he and I are blessed.
In case you wonder who is the handsome man next to me, it's my friend Richard who agreed to be my stand-in in case I'm unable to complete this ramble.
To confess, I'm unclear what to say. A eulogy is unnecessary. For those interested, Janet's life story may be read on the web. The URL is on the bottom of the last page of your program. Many have already seen it and have complimented me on it. To be honest, it was not a one-man job. I acknowledge the aid of my nephew Vladimir Weinstein for technical support and our friend, Barbara Giuffre, for valuable suggestions.
Janet was a loving, devoted mother and a friend to so many. She touched many hearts and left such lasting impressions. As I was writing this yesterday, I was interrupted by a call from a voice I did not recognize. If I heard correctly, it was Leo, a self-described "humble janitor." Leo remembered Janet from her days at the Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory. He told me of her warm smile and graciousness as he would enter her room to empty the wastebasket. This was at least 26 years ago!
The program has me down to express Words of gratitude. Although I did so in Janet's life story, let me thank you all once more. For the stay in a palatial home in Hawai'i. For the meals, the calls, the visits, the care and support you bestowed on Janet as well as on Adrian and me. The cards you sent gave her strength to continue to fight the disease.
I am also thankful for what the last nine months has taught me. As we live our hectic lives, we forget, or ignore, the basics. We take for granted those we feel will always be there. Take a moment now to be selfish and ask what really matters to you. The car? You'll replace it in a few years. The outfit? If you're like Janet, you'd soon tire of those "rags." No, what I've learned is that life, whether yours or that of your loved ones, can end at any time. And life cannot be replaced. Enjoy the time you have left; hopefully, with someone you love.
I'll close with a vignette about Janet that most are unaware of. She loved opera. Well..., certain opera arias. Her favorite was E lucevan le stelle from Puccini's Tosca. It's a man's lament for the lady he will never see again. A translation appears on the last page of your program. (Incidentally, I tweaked the text slightly to fit into my theme.) Who said opera is for effete wusses? I hope you enjoy it; it's about 3 minutes long. Thank you for your attention and, most importantly, stay healthy.
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Post Scriptum:
On the day after the Memorial service, I ran into a friend. Tom offered his condolences and left me with comforting thoughts that fit into the subject of my talk, Words of Gratitude. Given where Janet and I came from, she from Philadelphia and I from Belgrade, it is amazing how chance brought us together to spend such a loving, enjoyable and memorable marriage. It was a great ride. I am very thankful.